Monday, May 2, 2011

Daddy's no Mommy!

I've been contemplating the differences between Mom's and Dad's now that I'm a WAHD, and I've gained a greater perspective of the differences.  In recent years one of the debates has been who is best when raising children Mom or Dad... this question isn't going to be answered here. My own personal belief is that the best parent is a loving parent, Mom or Dad.

I'm a contractor by profession, and in my field I'm able to work from home during the day and work on projects at night.  Due to my schedule I spend a lot of my time with my 22 month old daughter Marissa, and I've come to notice how different my parenting skills are compared to my wife's.  I have to say that by nature my wife Marla is far more patient (measured in light years) than I am, or anyone I've ever know.  I always tell my wife that she is going to out live me because patient and laid back attitude.

People that know me consider me to be a 'clean freak', and I say "I'm not a clean freak, I'm just clean conscience".  This "personality trait" has a direct affect on the way that I parent.  Example; my wife can spend time with Marissa, not paying any attention to the mound of toys strewn about like a bomb went off, or any mess made for that matter.  When I spend time with my daughter the experience though enjoyable; is quite different, and cleaner by far.  Our daughter flows seamlessly from one parenting style to the other... she knows when she's in 'Rome', and when she's not.

You don't have to be a genius to know that the next difference is based on our physical make-up as a man and woman.  I spend 80 % my time wrestling, chasing, and tickling my daughter, we play hard and we are usually exhausted when we are done (a bonus at nap time).  My wife does not play physically in any form or fashion with our daughter; as a matter of fact most of their time is spent reading books and playing with stuffed animals... definitely the softer side of play.

When it comes to non-injury "Boo Boo's" we are similar in our initial response... we wait to see how Marissa responds to the pain... and I must say "she is a tough cookie".  When Marissa does cry I wish that I could conjure up some of mommy's loving tenderness, but it always seems to come out as "your okay, don't cry, daddy will get the duct-tape".  The interesting thing is she seems to get injured more when she is with her mom, the "laid back" nature doesn't always equal safety.

Differences aside, the beauty of the "Mother Father dynamic" is that you receive a wonderful balance that can make for well rounded child.

Enjoy the differences between you, and feel free to share your stories here.

3 comments:

  1. Haha...cute post! I found your blog today on Twitter. You've got some really interesting posts. :) I nice to hear a dad's take on it and still feel like you can really relate as a mom too. In our house, I'm the one who usually does more physical play, while my husband is the reader...lol. There definitely differences though. I'm definitely the more tender one when our daughter gets an "ouchie", while her father is like, "Shhhh! Don't say anything, she won't cry if we don't move." LOL! I was wondering, if you would be interested in participating in an online magazine that I recently started...we really need some dad perspectives. If you're interested, you can find me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/#!/mculturalfam Let me know. :)

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  2. Hello, I have a quick question for you about your site. If you could please get back to me at your earliest convenience I would greatly appreciate it. Have a great day!

    Thanks,
    Dan Gilbert
    Communications Coordinator
    Primrose Schools
    dgilbert@primroseschools.com

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  3. It is really surprising for me to find out that there're such daddies. And it's really pleasing. The case is I was brought up in a so-called traditional family where children were mom's business, and making money was father's.
    So, I'd like to share some info with you:
    Sport and Children
    By the way, I followed you up with GFC, it'd be great if you follow me back.

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